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- Problem? Problems!
211
You know something
l think you saved her life.
212
ln fact, l think you saved
the whole family. Bless you.
213
Why don't you come with me.
l'll take you down there.
214
So, tell us how
you met Peter?
215
Ma, she doesn't wanna
talk about that now, okay?
216
Why not? We could all
use a nice story.
217
- How do you know it was nice?
- Of course it was nice.
Why shouldn't it be nice?
218
What about that other girl? What's her
name? The one he met in the bar?
219
What's that got to do
with the price of eggs?
220
- Ashley Bartlett Bacon.
- Ox.
221
All l know is she was pretty
high and mighty for someone
named after breakfast meat.
222
Well, he has a nice girl now.
223
So, did you-- did you
steal him from Ashley?
224
l bet it was love
at first sight. Right?
225
l have a sense
about these things.
226
- Elsie, let her tell it.
- She is telling it.
227
l bet that he picked you up
in that fancy car of his.
228
What was it about him that,
you know, that first struck you?
229
lt was his, uh, smile.
230
They're caps.
Six hundred bucks a tooth.
231
Shh.
232
Well, um--
233
We saw each other,
and, um...
234
he, uh, smiled.
235
And--
236
And l knew that...
my life would never be the same.
237
So--
238
Tomorrow night, 8:00.
239
What?
240
l got lce Capades.
l know a guy.
241
Huh.
242
Hi.
243
Um--
Bet you're wondering...
244
what l'm doing here
in the middle of the night, huh?
245
Well, l-l thought
l should introduce myself.
246
My name's Lucy.
Lucy Eleanor Moderatz.
247
l think you should know your
family thinks we're engaged.
248
Never been engaged before.
This is all very sudden for me.
249
Um--
250
What, what
l really came here,
251
uh, to tell you
was that, um...
252
l didn't, l didn't mean
for this to happen.
253
l, l don't know
what to do.
254
l mean, if, if, you were awake,
l-l wouldn't be in this mess.
255
Oh, god. Not that
l'm blaming you. Sorry.
256
lt's just that, you know,
when l was, when l was a kid,
257
l always imagined
what l would...
258
be like
or where l would be...
259
or what l would have
when l got older.
260
And, you know,
it was the normal stuff.
261
You know, l'd have a house
and family and things like that.
262
Not-- You know, not that l'm,
l'm complaining or anything.
263
because, you know, l have,
l have, l have a cat.
264
l have an apartment,
um--
265
Sole possession of the remote
control. That's very important.
266
lt's just...
267
l never met anybody that
l could laugh with, you know?
268
D--
269
Do you believe in love
at first sight?
270
Nah, l bet you don't. You're
probably too sensible for that.
271
Or have you ever like
seen somebody and,
272
and you knew that if only
that person really knew you...
273
they would, well, of course, dump
the perfect model that they were with...
274
and, and realize that you were
the one that they wanted...
275
to just grow old with.
276
Have you ever fallen in love with
somebody you haven't even talked to?
277
Have you ever been so alone you spend
the night confusing a man in a coma?
278
Bryan Lynch.
Mr. Bryan Lynch,
279
please call
Amber Lynch at 2617.
280
Oh, my god.
281
Bye.
282
- Lucy!
- Hi.
- We didn't know you were here.
283
- Hi.
- Hi. Were you here all night?
284
You're like me.
l could always sleep anywhere.
285
And believe me, she has.
286
Wait to go, Gram!
287
- So, how's Peter?
- Oh, well, he's got more color.
288
- He has some color.
Looks like he has some color.
- Yeah.
289
Well, l, l have to go, so it
was great to see you guys again.
290
- Tell her. Go on, tell her.
- Yeah.
291
We didn't get to, uh,
celebrate Christmas, so, uh,
292
it would be nice
if you could join us.
293
Oh, um-- Oh, l-l-l would
love to, but l, l can't.
294
- Jack's gonna be there.
- That's right.
You haven't met Jack yet.
295
- No, not yet.
- Oh, he'll be so happy to meet you.
296
- So you'll come tonight?
- l, l, l really shouldn't
because l have to work.
297
-l can't.
-Well, look here. Put your phone
number and address down there.
298
- Midge'll call you
and talk you into it.
- Okay.
299
And here's another card
for when you change your mind.
300
We're in the estate
furniture business.
301
We buy furniture
from dead people.
302
Okay. All right, well
l have, l have it.
303
- So, bye. Bye.
- Bye, dear. See you later.
304
Bye.
305
- Ma'am? Excuse me, ma'am.
- What? What is this?
306
l'm sorry, Mrs. Callaghan.
These are your husband's things.
307
- He's not my husband!
- l'm sorry. Your fiancee.
308
Uh, you're Peter's fiancee?
309
- Okay.
- Dalton Clark.
310
Colleague of Peter's at Lubel,
Parker, Jacobs and Fink.
311
- l have to go now.
- Oh, he's a great guy.
312
He's had a tough year. What,
with the accident last month and all.
313
- Accident?
- Well, of course it was an accident?
314
l mean, it wasn't my--
Did he tell you it was my fault?
315
We're playing basketball,
all right? l carry a pencil!
316
- l'm a lawyer! l do that!
- Okay.
317
- Jesus, what's he telling--
- lt's gonna be okay.
318
- So what's the big deal?
- What's the big deal?
319
Jerry, they think l'm their
future daughter-in-law.
320
And the grandmother,
then she's got this heart thing.
And if l tell her the truth,
321
she's gonna have a heart attack,
and she's gonna die,
and it's gonna be on my head.
322
Well, then, go along with it.
323
And when Peter comes
out of the coma,
324
the family'll be so happy
they won't care that you lied to them.
325
They'll probably even
thank you for it.
326
Just mustard!
327
- Okay. What if he doesn't
come out of his coma?
- Well, then who's to know?
328
- l don't know. Oh, no.
- Ah. Look, look, Lucy.
329
When my mother found out l
was getting married to my wife,
her intestines exploded.
330
- Now, you tell them now--
- Oh, my god.
331
- Huh, you might as well shoot Grandma.
- Oh!
332
Come on, Mel.
333
Mel.
334
What am l doing?
335
- Lucy!
- Hi, Saul, hi.
336
- You made it, huh?
- Yeah.
337
- How you feel?
- Okay. Okay.
338
Come on, keep me company for a while.
l don't like to smoke in the house.
339
- Okay. l'm trying to quit.
- Listen-- You want one?
340
That's good.
Here, sit down.
341
-They don't bother you, do they?
-Uh, no, no, l'm fine.
342
Did you know that
l was Peter's godfather?
343
Really? l-l thought you
had to be Catholic for that.
344
- Ox fudged it over.
- Oh.
345
He donated 50 folding chairs
to Father Shea's bingo night.
346
You know, being a godfather
is very important to Catholics.
347
lt means you're practically
part of the family.
348
Well, you're lucky.
lt's really important...
349
to have family around
this time of year.
350
Are you, uh-- l mean,
are your parents with you?
351
No, no. My, my mom died
when l was really young...
352
and, uh, a couple of years ago,
my dad got sick...
353
and, uh, we moved from lndiana
to Chicago so he could
go to a research hospital.
354
Research. A medical term
for very expensive, huh?
355
Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
356
l-l-l had to quit school and
l started working for the C.T.A.
357
And, um, about a year ago,
358
he decided he had had enough
research, and he passed away.
359
-My wife of 51 years passed away
two years ago, February the 9.
-l'm sorry.
360
- Yeah, it was a rough time for me.
- Yeah.
361
But Ox got me through.
362
- You're good friends?
- The best!
363
Lucy, the Callaghans,
364
well, they took me in
as part of their family.
365
l'd never let anyone hurt them.
366
Neither would l.
367
l believe you wouldn't.
368
Lucy? You came?
369
Hi, Saul. Oh, this is great!
370
Hey, come on in, you two. lt's freezing out here. Elsie made her eggnog.
371
- Word to the wise: Drink soda.
- Okay.
372
Ox, Mom, look who's here.
Lucy came!
373
- Oh, my!
- Hi. Hi, Mary.
- lt's gonna be like Christmas.
374
- Come on in. lt's cold out there.
- These are for you.
- Oh, sweetheart, thank you.
375
- We've got the most wonderful dinner.
- lt smells so good. Hi.
376
This is so beautiful.
377
- That's Peter on the right.
- He's so sweet.
378
- Oh, yeah, the squirrels.
- Eggnog everyone.
379
Ma, where are you?
l'm serving your eggnog.
380
l'm getting my camera.
381
- Come on, everybody.
Get close to the tree.
- Oh, Christmas pictures.
382
- Lucy, come on.
- Come on, Lucy.
- Come on, let's go. Let's go.
383
l-l don't want-- l-l--
384
Watch the birdie.
385
- Oh, Ma, take it again. l blinked.
- Well, you're lucky. l'm blind.
386
- Oh, yeah. l love it.
- Oh. Excuse me.
387
- l don't drink anymore.
- Oh.
388
l don't drink any less either.
389
- Perhaps l should.
- You got me. You got me.
390
- Oh, look at this.
- Oh, more presents.
Okay, l'll take these two.
391
- What is this?
- Whoopsie, whoopsie.
- Open it.
392
- What is that?
- Turn 'em over.
393
- Pierced? Really?
- Mm-hmm.
394
- Oh, my god! Thank you. Thank you.
- We'll go to Walmart on Monday.
395
Don't thank me. lf it was up to me,
l would've gotten you a Barbie.
396
- Oh, did you like that?
- More presents. Oh, boy.
- lsn't that wonderful?
397
- We hit the jackpot.
- Ma, this is for you.
- Thanks, dear.
398
- A present.
- Oh. To Ox from Uncle Al.
399
- Who the hell is
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